Welcome to Linda Ikeji's Blog: 10/28/2007 - 11/04/2007

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Wednesday, 7 November 2007

Katherine Edoho's interview

Our softsell mags finally came out today. On the front cover of Encomium magazine was Katherine Edoho, the wife of Frank Edoho, the guy who had an opinion about single women and 'their' habits.

Well, for reasons best known to Katherine, she also decided to grant a tell-all interview to Encomium magazine.

I know I talk too much lol, but this couple have taken the crown.

Here's what Katherine had to say about her husband and marriage.

Headline: "Frank Edoho is a beast. He batters me at the slightest provocation" - Wife

You courted each other for close to five years, did you notice any trace of swiftness to anger in him in those days?
Katherine "No. You could see snippets of temper then, but that's where it ends. Do you think if I had seen this I would have entered? He is a generous man but because he is generous does not mean he would beat everything he has given me?"

So, what actually caused this last beating?
"He said I wanted to run away with his kids. I told him I wanted to travel so that we could take a break a little. I told him I was traveling to Brazil because I didn't want him to trace my whereabouts until after one week. Perhaps he would have enough time to calm down. I was expecting him to sit me down and ask "Why Brazil?" instead he started shouting, saying I want to take his kids from him. He got violently physical, he took my box from me. I travelled without anything. He trailed me to the airport to beg me and I said "Don't come near me, you cannot be a mad man in the morning, and you are sane in the afternoon. He was coming close to me, I was moving back. He said why are you moving back? I said you are asking me? Do I know the next thing you would do here?" Then, I was bleeding, because he pushed me and I cut my leg somewhere. I was not supposed to travel with our son, because he was dragging him with me. I started crying, telling the cabin members not to leave me behind. So I was running and putting pressure on my leg and bleeding the more. When I came back, I told my younger brother "Please, the kind of beating they gave me before I travelled, I cannot take it two times. Help me to come and pack my belongings, just your presence alone...if you don't come with me, I'll take police to go and pack my things from the house because I need peace. For now, I cannot have it at home. When we reached home, my son said "Mummy, didnt daddy say you should not come back to the house?"

In the course of those beatings, have you ever retaliated physically?
"It's instinctive, I grew up with boys. Somehow I'll fight back or push, but you can't compare a woman's strenght to that of a man. The last beating was something else. I was busy dodging my eyes because Frank punched me as if he was fighting with his fellow man. For many days I couldn't make use of my left eye. I wore glasses throughout my stay in Cameroun. I kept crying and shouting "my mummy o". The headache? It was migrain times ten."

Frank also said he doesn't like you mingling with unmarried women, don't you think he has a point?"
"Like what? I only have two unmarried friends. One is my brother's fiancee, the other is Thelma, my colleague in NTA."

"Whats the reason he gives for not wanting Thelma by your side?"
"He says he doesn't like her aura, and I tell him I don't like your PA's aura too. I dont evidence against his PA, but there is something about him that is not just right. I am perceptive. There is something about that guy that is not quite right."

But the bible says women should submit to their husbands. If you do away with these single women, dont you think there will be peace in your home?
"I just told you that the last time he beat me was because we were supposed to meet somewhere at a particular time. I was delayed somehow, so when I got to a place, I didn't see him. He later called me and said "where are you" I said I was at home. He said, "Liar". I told him I went for salsa that I had gone home. He didn't believe me. Now, what has single girls got to do with that?. I don't involve my friends in anything about my home. I've left home, I paid for a place I wouldn't want disclosed. He sees the kids in their school."

What do you think would serve as a solution to all these?
"He's making a move for reconciliation (shows this reporter two different text messages from Frank) "I apologise for having slapped you, I really admit that what I did was beastly. But please come back, I've learnt my lesson". My sister, it's not coming back, it's how do we stop that?"

She went on and on...I'm stopping here 'cos I'm tired of typing.

Seriously, I don't know what to say...except that I'm a little disappointed that Frank hits women (His wife can't lie can she?). I remember inviting them to my Magazine launch last year and they both honored my invitation. I sat beside them and thought they made a perfect couple. Young, good looking, with great jobs.

Well, I guess it's not always as it seems...right?

What do you guys think?

Tuesday, 6 November 2007

Homosexuality

I was going to bring you Naija Entertainment gists today...but can't find neither City People nor Encomium magazines on the news stands. They usually come out on Mondays, don't know what's wrong this week. But hopefully they'll be available tomorrow. So expect that tomorrow...

While we are waiting for that, there's something else I'd like to talk about. HOMOSEXUALITY.

I met a proudly gay guy today...and it was a big eye opener. In this part of the world, it's extremely rare to find proudly gay guys. Guys who tell you I'm gay and very proud to be one. Infact wonders what heterosexual men see in women.

I remember a few years ago, a Unilag student came on Funmi Iyanda's show to proudly declare he was gay and was asking for gay rights in Naija.

After coming out openly.....he's now based in the UK.

Guess our people aren't ready for such!

In the business I'm in, some of the guys actively in it are either gay or have homosexual tendencies. The don't come out in the open about their sexual preference but you can tell with body movement, the way they talk and flock around themselves and especially the way they ignore and bitch at women that there's something off about them. Oh, I've met quite a few of them. They are quite creative, talented and fun to be with, more fun to look at them making passes at each other...

The one I met today tried for a while to educate me on thrills and frills of homosexuality...an hour later I was more confused than before.

I don't understand it one bit. It's still a big mystery to me.

Why would any man have strong physical and emotional attraction to men that they don't usually feel for women?

What is the real explanation of why some men are gay and some are not? In a family of four brothers, how do you get three straight ones and a gay one? What happened to the gay one? He was born on the wrong day?

Is homosexuality as a result of genetic influences? Is it hereditary? Biological? Social experiences? Peer pressure? Is it spiritual?

Does anyone know?

Jokes and Pix

It's 2 am and I'm blogging. See the love I have for y'all?
Anyway, here are a few jokes to put smiles on your faces
Starting with this...
Answer this question
"In which direction is the bus pictured below traveling?"
Look carefully at the picture.
Do you know the! answer? (The only possible answers are "left" or "right.")
Think about it
Still don't know?
Okay, I'll tell you.
The pre-schoolers all answered "left."
When asked, "Why do you think the bus is traveling in the left direction?"
They answered: "Because you can't see the door."
How do you feel now ??? I know, me too.

Yes, please go ahead and hit your head on the wall...lol.



Disorder

...this one will crack you up...be ready to laugh till you drop...

These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.

ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?

ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!

ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
WITNESS: We do.
ATTORNEY: You do?
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.

ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-one-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one.

ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you shitt'in me?

ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Uh.... I was gett'in laid!

ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Are you kidding? Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?

ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Now, whose death do you suppose terminated it?

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Guess.

ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. Would you like to rephrase that?

ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK?
What school did you go to?
WITNESS: Oral.

ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table, wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him!

ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Huh....are you qualified to ask that question?

--- And the best for last: ---

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law, dumbass.

Here's another one...

A goner indeed

A man and a woman were dating. She, being of a religious nature, had held back the worldly pleasure that he wanted from her so badly. In fact, he had never even seen her naked.

One day, as they slowly drove down the freeway, she remarked about his slow-driving habits. "I can't stand it anymore," she told him. "Let's play a game. For every 5 miles per hour over the speed limit [60 MPH] you drive, I'll remove one piece of clothing.

He enthusiastically agreed and sped up the car.
He reached the 65 MPH mark, so she took off her blouse.
* At 70 off came the pants.
* At 75 it was her bra...and
* At 80 her panties.


Now seeing her naked for the first time...and traveling faster than he ever had before...he became very excited and lost control of the car. He veered off the road, went over an embankment and hit a tree!

His girlfriend was not hurt, but he was trapped. She tried to pull him free but alas he was stuck. "Go to the road and get help," he said.
"I don't have anything to cover myself with!" she replied. The man felt around, but could only reach one of his shoes.
"You'll have to put this between your legs to cover it up," he told her.
So she did as he said and went up to the road for help.

Along came a truck driver. Seeing a naked, crying woman along the road, he pulled over to hear her story.
"My boyfriend! My boyfriend!" she sobs, "He's stuck and I can't pull him out!"
The truck driver looking down at the shoe between her legs replies, "Ma'am, if he's in that far, I'm afraid he's a goner!"

Men NEVER listen ? Nice one, enjoy!
A man and his wife receive a letter from their daughter who went to study overseas:
My beloved Parents, I miss you so much. I don't know when I'm coming home, but it seems not anytime soon. It breaks my heart to think that by the time I get back you'll be too old. So enclosed you will find a bottle of a potion I have invented. It will make you young, so when I return you'll be the same age as I left you. NOTE: "Please take only one drop"NOTE: "Please take only one drop"

So they open the envelope and in it there is a bottle with a red potion..The husband looks at the wife and says: "You go first." So the wife opens the bottle and takes a drop, there after the husband follows. Indeed they do turn 5 years younger. A year passes and the daughter returns home to find her mother young and beautiful, carrying a baby on her back.

The mother proceeds to tell her daughter how the potion worked and made her look young. The daughter is delighted and asks about her father. "Your father, my child, got so jealous that I was young and beautiful so he drank the whole bottle."
"So where is he?"
"Oh, that's him I have on my back
Never go to HR
After 2 years of selfless service, a man realized that he has not been promoted, no transfer, no salary increase no commendation and that the Company is not doing any thing about it. So he decided to walk up to His HR Manager one morning and after exchanging greetings, he told his HR Manager his observation. The boss looked at him, laughed and asked him to sit down saying. My friend, you have not worked here for even one day.
The man was surprised to hear this, but the manager went on to explain.
Manager:- How many days are there in a year?
Man:- 365 days and some times 366
Manager:- how many hours make up a day?
Man:- 24 hours
Manager:- How long do you work in a day?
Man:- 8am to 4pm . i.e. 8 hours a day.
Manager:- So, what fraction of the day do you work in hours?
Man:- (He did some arithmetic and said 8/24 hours i.e. 1/3(one third)
Manager:- That is nice of you! What is one-third of 366 days?
Man:- 122 (1/3x366 = 122 in days)
Manager:- Do you come to work on weekends?
Man:- No sir
Manager:- How many days are there in a year that are weekends?
Man:- 52 Saturdays and 52 Sundays equals to 104 days
Manager:- Thanks for that. If you remove 104 days from 122 days, how many days do you now have?
Man:- 18 days.
Manager:- OK! I do give you 2 weeks sick leave every year. Now remove that 14 days from the 18 days left. How many days do you have remaining?
Man:- 4 days
Manager:- Do you work on New Year day?
Man:- No sir!
Manager:- Do you come to work on workers day?
Man:- No sir!
Manager:- So how many days are left?
Man:- 2 days sir!
Manager:- Do you come to work on the (National holiday )?
Man:- No sir!
Manager:- So how many days are left?
Man:- 1 day sir!
Manager:- Do you work on Christmas day?
Man:- No sir!
Manager:- So how many days are left?
Man:- None sir!
Manager:- So, what are you claiming?
Man:- I have understood, Sir. I did not realise that I was stealing Company money all these days.
Moral - NEVER GO TO HR FOR HELP!!!
HR = HIGH RISK

Pix


Naomi Campbell's dress is...?


TY Bello's hair is...?


Pregnant Halle Berry's boobs now look...?


Naija Entertainment gist coming next. Stay tuned!

Monday, 5 November 2007

Question + Apprentice Africa

Do long distance relationships work? I mean, you're on one side of the world and they're on the other side. How do you make it work?

Apprentice Africa
Have you heard of The Apprentice; Donald Trump's TV show which hedescribed as a 16-week job interview? The world's biggest businessreality show comes to Africa with title The Apprentice Africa hostedin Nigeria, produced by The Executive Group and Storm Vision.

18 candidates from across Africa are to compete to win an executivejob with an annual salary of $200,000 and an executive car. Someonegets fired off the show every week till we have the last woman or manstanding.Auditions will be held in Washington DC, Lagos, Abuja, Enugu, London,Accra, Nairobi, Dar es Salam or Kampala.

This is a great opportunityfor Africans living in the Diaspora to come home and make good oninternational TV. This is the ultimate job interview.The CEO of The Apprentice Africa is Mr. Biodun Sobanjo, Chairman CEO of TROYKA Holdings parent company of Insight Grey, Media Comm, Optimum Exposures, Halogen Services and four other companies. Biodun Sobanjoembodies class, style, charisma, and business persona.

Application is free and still on. You may apply online athttp://www.theapprenticeafrica.com/. Details about the show's format are alsoavailable at the website too.

Hope y'all had a great weekend. See y'all soon.

Saturday, 3 November 2007

HER!

Someone wants to say hi to y'all.

I couldn't come up with an appropriate title for this post...so we'll call it HER.

Check HER out.




















I don't know what to say. Help me out! She's........?

Friday, 2 November 2007

D banj: MTV African artiste of the year 2007

Our own Dapo Oyebanjo, aka D Banj is MTV Europe Music Awards African Artist of the year.


What can I say? I'm mightily proud of him and very proud to be a Nigerian.

Nigerians know how to shine anywhere and everywhere.

Nigerians are usually the best in everything they do.

Nigerians are talented, creative, different and have a lot to offer the world.

Aren't you proud to be Nigerian?

Send your congratulations to a young man with immense talent. A young man who has brought joy to the lives of many people with his music. A young 27 year old, who is humble, friendly, giving and very hardworking. A young man who didn't listen to discouraging words and followed his dream.
Yesterday Thursday 1st November, 2007, he became MTV African Artist of the year. The second Nigerian to win it after Tuface.
Congrats to you D banj.

Big Brother Africa Scandal

I don't know how many of have heard about the scandal rocking Big Brother Africa 2. Here's what a Namibiam journalist, Natasha Uys wrote about it.

Thanks to the anon who brought this to my attention!

HOW IT WENT DOWN
After only 30 minutes, the housemates were so drunk that they could barely complete the fishing task.

As a post on the BBA Ultimate Fan Web blog said, it was like the blind leading the blind drunk.

The housemates were falling all over the place, stumbling into each other, holding each other, kissing ...

After a few more shots of booze all round, the day went from bad to worse as the crazy behaviour continued.

After a while the 'Big 5's' bodies just couldn't handle it any more and one after the other they started puking their guts out. Ofu and Tati were undoubtedly the two most out of it.

Don't know what was going through Richard's mind at the time but he seemed to think that two all-but passed-out women was a sexual invitation! Lying between the two women in the bedroom, Richard began to kiss and fondle and fiddle with Ofu, and this while his lover - Tati - was lying right next to him.

As Richard groped and abused Ofu, a dazed and confused Maureen walked in and out of the room - babbling, seemingly at a loss over what to do. She had tried to lead Richard out of the room, but he was running on rampant and eager to get back to the two women. At one point she got him to sit on the couch, at which stage he seemed to revel in sniffing his fingers.

As Maureen struggled with the situation, the paramedics were sent in and Richard was eventually locked in the diary room. This is also when Biggie decided to switch to the garden camera.

After the paramedics left, the housemates slept for a very long period. And when they finally surfaced, they tried to piece together the events of the afternoon. Tatiana and Ofunekka said they could not remember how they even got to the bedroom.

Although Richard seemed to remember bits and pieces, he certainly did not divulge the details.

But the man sure strutted around the house as though he owned all the women.

He was obviously cock-a-hoop, pronouncing loudly "I have seen the rivers and mountains of Big Brother", and then guffawing in a very self-satisfied way.

Not only did he seem very, very pleased with himself, but he boldly pronounced, almost shouted, that he had "changed strategy" and "I'm going to bump all the women in the BBA house" - not once, not twice, but a number of times.

He even shouted out a demand to Tati, in full hearing of Ofu and Maureen, that he wanted a BJ.
What Richard did to Ofunneka can only be described as morally reprehensible.
There are even those on BBA forums and other BBA threads charging that it is tantamount to rape, with many calling for the Tanzanian to be removed from the Big Brother house for what he did to his Nigerian housemate.

Abuse should not be tolerated in any way, shape or form, whether it is in the form of physical or emotional violence or a sexual affront.

Diehard Richard fans are trying to play down the incident, shifting the blame on to Ofunneka, claiming that that she "wanted it".

Hello people? That is like saying that women ask to be raped?! As one message on the SMS strip said, "When is someone going to teach Rich what NO and STOP IT means?" But don't be surprised if Richard fans try to paint him as a saint of sexual favours.

Any decent man would never take advantage of a woman in that situation.

Ofunneka was unaware of what was going on around her, unaware of what Richard was doing to her yet he continued to abuse her in the most vile manner.

















Others are trying to blame Maureen. They say she should have hit Richard over the head with something. Well, imagine if she had knocked him out, and he had turned on her?!! When will this man be stopped? Viewers across Africa have already given his adulterous relationship with Tatiana the stamp of approval by not voting him out on numerous occasions.

Do they really approve of his abusive and chauvinistic behaviour? What message does this send out to men and women across Africa? That it's okay to cheat on your wife, to sexually cheat on live television, to intimately grope a passed-out woman?

The contest is due to reach a climax on November 11. But the $100,000 on offer to the winner may prove chump change compared to the settlement sought by Ofunneka and her lawyers once she escapes the Big Brother bubble and views footage of her very public humiliation. (According to First post)

Now if it's true that Richard really did those things to Ofunneka, then the issue needs to be addressed and Richard needs to know that there are some things you just don't do and if you do it, you should be ready to face the consequences. Fondling a woman who's passed out is not only wrong on every level, it's psychotic. Where do you get off thinking it's not only okay to publicly cheat on your wife, but also to humiliate another woman in the full glare of millions of Africans. What? Richard expects us to pat him on the back with approval or clap for him? Evicting him is not enough...he needs to face the music.

Who saw it? Who can give us more info on the scandal?

If he's guilty, what should be his punishment?

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